It’s a bad day when a crab grabs you by the jiggly bits (video)

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If you think you’re having a bad day spare a thought for the unfortunate fellow in the video above. Thought to show members of a Hmong hill tribe somewhere in Lao PDR, the video dramatically illustrates the almost crippling effects a pair of sharp pointed claws can have when seizing a man by his man bits.

Although a welcome addition to any dinner table — after stopping by a pot of boiling water or grill on the way — a mud crab in your bath tub is not such a pleasant experience… as shown above.

It appears the unfortunate fellow taking pride of place in the video above picked the wrong time and place to leave his man bits not fully protected.

The video begins with two men lifting a third, screaming man out of a stream. Dangling from the third man’s man bits, with not inconsiderable force judging by his screams, is what appears to be one of the species of crab commonly referred to as mud crabs in Asia, Africa, and Australia.

Vietnamese subtitles under the video only relay the obvious: “get it off me. It hurts, so much”.

Not demonstrating any degree of urgency, one of the man’s friends delicately grasps the dangling crustacean and attempts to pull it off the man. The mud crab is having none of this and, probably figuring it has nothing to loose, continues to tightly grip the undercarriage of its victim.

As the man continues to howl in agony, his friends debate the best method for encouraging a mud crab to release its vice-like grip, before settling on traumatic amputation of the crab’s arm as the appropriate solution. Unfortunately for the victim, the forced removal of its right arm only causes the mud crab to apply more pressure with its left and the man howls even louder, before the crab’s left arm is similarly removed.

It’s not a scene of instant relief though. The crab’s left claw maintains its vice-like grip on the victims man bits even after it has been torn from the body of the unfortunate crab, the man continuing to scream until his friend deftly rips it off his dangly bits.

No information is available on the severity of the injuries suffered in the mud crab attack, but our guess is that the victim will take much greater care in future on where he lets his man bits dangle. As for the mud crab? We can only presume that the victim took his time devouring every last edible portion of it.

So, unless you’ve been grabbed by your man bits while having your morning bath, you’re really *not* having a bad day.

 

Feature video Sly Oak

 

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